Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Day Twenty One

What I say: I wish I lived in Middleboro, Massachusetts...The no swearing law is such a fabulous idea!

What I mean: That is some fucked up shit right there. Are they friggen serious? In case you haven't heard, Middleboro Town Meeting has passed a law forbidding cursing in public and resulting in a fine. Are you fucking kidding me? I'm pretty sure I remember learning about a little document written a while back called the Constitution!  Now I'm not a lawyer (obviously), but I'm pretty sure that in that little document there’s a right called "Freedom of Speech." Maybe it’s me but it seems that this law would be in direct opposition of that right. Don't get me wrong - is cursing in public rude? Sure. Is it ignorant? Maybe (for my opinion on the use of the "F" word, read this.)  But to tell people it is against the law is a little over the top, don't you think? Last time I checked, it wasn't against the law to be rude or ignorant. Except in Middleboro, apparently. Supposedly the purpose of the law is to stop youths from hanging around in public areas of the town creating disturbances. Isn’t that called loitering? Or causing a disturbance? Aren’t there already laws in place to police that kind of behavior?

In my opinion, this is a perfect example of what is totally wrong with society today. Let's say there's a group of teenagers hanging around the center of town, swearing and yelling obscenities, since that is apparently a teenager's idea of a good time in Middleboro (woo-fucking-hoo).  An officer is in the vicinity, and hears the offending curse words.  Let's say the kid with the potty mouth is only 14.   Who do you think is going to pay the fine for swearing in public?  Certainly not the jobless potty-mouthed teenager.  Let's say the kid, being a typical teenager, isn't very fond of his parents at the moment - wouldn't that be a great way to piss off the 'rents?  Do they charge by the swear? If Billy calls Bobby a fucking asshole, does the fine double, since there were two curse words, even though they were used in one sentence?  What if Bobby calls Billy a twat waffle eating shit nugget?  Since Bobby retaliated with a double curse sentence, will that negate the offense, or will they both get a ticket, or two each?  Holy I'm confused! That'll be one fine. 

What I mean is, the parents will be on the hook for the fine, the fine will probably be unenforceable if it isn't paid, and what does the kid learn?  Nada.  It will probably end up costing the town more money than it's worth in the end.  Printing tickets, going to court if the little ball busters don't pay, parents wanting "proof" that their kid really said what the officer said he said (holy fuck...I confused myself again...but it makes sense, I swear)!  Things must be really great in Middleboro if this is all that is on their radar. 

And what if the police aren't around? If someone is swearing and acting like an asshole in line at the grocery store or while you are waiting to fill your gas tank, can you put a fine in place that is similar to a "citizen's arrest," where the person who hears the swear can just haul off and punch douche bag in the mouth? Really hard? Now that I'm all for! 

What do you think?  Should swearing in public be punishable by fine?  You know how I feel.  

In the meantime, watch your fucking mouth if you happen to pass through Middleboro!  It's close to my hometown, but I certainly won't be going ANYWHERE near it ....unless I hit the friggen lottery!

Thank you, Mike, for helping me with my writer's block (again)!


  1. I was wondering when this would make your blog lol

  2. WV has a very old law that is similar. I think the courts and maybe jails would be too full if it were enforced. :)

  3. First, there is no way upholding the law as you said.

    Second it's a stupid law, people have the right to free speech and should use their heads when out in public. If a group of teenagers is slumming it at the mall and we walk by and the teenagers are swearing I first think to myself, I was there once and then I say out loud, "Good thing there aren't any 8 year old around to hear that." in my most sarcastic voice, they usually get the hint and apologize.

    Middleboro ranks right up there for a Wondernuts Award with Concord and their banning plastic water bottles.


  4. I learned quite a few new words reading this!